CELPIP® Writing Task 1 sample: Long Wait Without Updates
Writing an Email · 27 minutes · 150–200 words · Published
Original practice questions in CELPIP® task formats, created independently by CELPIP Study.
Practice question
You visited a walk-in clinic in Ottawa for a non-urgent consultation and were told the wait was about 45 minutes. After nearly two hours, you had to leave for a prepaid evening course, and reception said leaving would remove your name from the list. You accept that some patients may need priority, but the clinic offered no updates and would not let you wait nearby for a text message. You want the clinic to improve communication without promising exact appointment times.
Write an email to the walk-in clinic manager, Ms. Simran Bains.
- Describe your visit and the information you received.
- Explain how the lack of updates affected your choices.
- Suggest practical ways for the clinic to communicate changing waiting times.
Model answers
Level 7 sample answer
172 words
Dear Ms. Bains,
I am writing about the waiting information at your walk-in clinic in Ottawa. When I visited for a non-urgent consultation, I was told the wait would be about 45 minutes. I waited for nearly two hours and then had to leave for a prepaid evening course. Reception told me I would lose my place if I left.
The extra waiting was difficult because I had planned around the original estimate. There was no updates while I waited, and I could not wait nearby for a text message. I understand that some patients need to be seen sooner than others. However, it would help to know when the expected wait changes.
Could you ask reception staff to give regular updates, even when they cannot give an exact time? You could also consider allowing patients to wait nearby if they can return quickly after a message. This would give people more choice about how to use their time.
Thank you for consider these suggestions. I would appreciate a reply.
Sincerely,
Reza
Why this answer is at level 7
This level 7 answer clearly describes the visit, explains the inconvenience, and offers relevant solutions in a polite tone. Compared with the stronger answers, grammatical errors interrupt the reading, and the explanation of how missing updates affected the writer’s decisions is less developed.
The extra waiting was difficult because I had planned around the original estimate.
— Content/Coherence: This connects the original estimate to the inconvenience, but leaves the planning problem fairly general. A higher-level answer explains more precisely how missing updates prevented the writer from deciding whether to stay before the prepaid course.This would give people more choice about how to use their time.
— Vocabulary: The wording is clear and appropriate, although “more choice” and “use their time” are broad expressions. The higher-level answers describe the particular decisions patients need to make and the information that would support them.There was no updates while I waited
— Readability: The meaning remains clear, but “was” does not agree with the plural “updates.” The stronger answers maintain grammatical control while explaining the same waiting-room problem.Could you ask reception staff to give regular updates, even when they cannot give an exact time?
— Task Fulfillment: This practical request directly respects the instruction to improve communication without promising exact times. A higher-level answer makes the proposal more specific by suggesting revised ranges or explaining when staff should provide updates.
Level 9 sample answer
188 words
Dear Ms. Bains,
I would like to suggest improvements to waiting-time communication at your Ottawa walk-in clinic. During my recent visit for a non-urgent consultation, reception estimated a 45-minute wait. Nearly two hours later, I still had not been seen and had to leave for a prepaid evening course. I was told that leaving would remove my name from the list.
I appreciate that patients with more pressing needs may be given priority. However, the lack of updates left me in the dark about whether staying longer would be worthwhile. The refusal to let me wait nearby for a text message also limited my options. As a result, I spent considerably longer than expected at the clinic without receiving a consultation.
Could staff announce revised waiting estimates whenever delays become substantial? Even an approximate range would help patients plan. It would also be useful to explore a text notification option, with clear rules about how quickly patients must return.
I am asking for better communication rather than guaranteed appointment times. Thank you for considering these suggestions and letting me know whether either could be introduced.
Kind regards,
Reza
Why this answer is at level 9
This level 9 answer combines a clear account, fluent language, and practical suggestions that respect changing clinical priorities. Compared with level 11, it develops the decision-making problem less precisely and does not offer an alternative if text notifications are impractical.
As a result, I spent considerably longer than expected at the clinic without receiving a consultation.
— Content/Coherence: This clearly summarizes the outcome and connects it to the preceding problems. However, it largely returns to facts already established; the level 11 answer develops the argument by explaining why an unchanged estimate stops helping patients make decisions.the lack of updates left me in the dark about whether staying longer would be worthwhile.
— Vocabulary: “Left me in the dark” naturally expresses uncertainty, while “worthwhile” connects that uncertainty to a choice. The level 11 answer is more precise about the actual constraint: whether a consultation remained feasible before the course.Nearly two hours later, I still had not been seen and had to leave for a prepaid evening course.
— Readability: The time marker and controlled verb forms make the sequence easy to follow. The level 11 answer integrates the missing update, departure, and consequence for the waiting list more tightly, giving the account greater sentence variety without losing clarity.It would also be useful to explore a text notification option, with clear rules about how quickly patients must return.
— Task Fulfillment: The return-time condition makes the suggestion practical for a walk-in clinic. The level 11 answer extends this practical thinking by offering a simpler communication alternative if texting cannot be introduced.
Level 11 sample answer
191 words
Dear Ms. Bains,
I am writing to recommend changes to how your Ottawa walk-in clinic communicates delays. At a recent visit for a non-urgent consultation, I was advised of an approximate 45-minute wait. After nearly two hours without an update, I had to leave for a prepaid evening course; reception confirmed that doing so would remove me from the list.
Clinical priorities can understandably change, and I would not expect an estimated wait to function as a guaranteed appointment. Nevertheless, an estimate loses its usefulness when a substantial delay goes unacknowledged. Because waiting nearby for a text message was also refused, I could neither use that time elsewhere nor assess whether a consultation remained feasible before my course.
Could the clinic introduce periodic updates, including revised ranges when exact times are uncertain? A voluntary text notification system might also help, provided patients receive clear instructions about returning promptly. If that option is impractical, simply explaining the available choices at reception would enable more informed decisions.
I would welcome your response on which improvements could realistically be adopted. Keeping patients in the loop would make unavoidable delays easier to manage.
Sincerely,
Reza
Why this answer is at level 11
This level 11 answer develops a precise argument: changing clinical priorities are understandable, but patients still need useful information to make choices. Its controlled sentences, exact vocabulary, and realistic alternatives make the formal request persuasive and complete.
Nevertheless, an estimate loses its usefulness when a substantial delay goes unacknowledged.
— Content/Coherence: This explains why the communication failure matters, moving beyond a description of inconvenience. It connects the acceptance of changing clinical priorities to the request for updates, giving the complaint a clear and balanced argument.I could neither use that time elsewhere nor assess whether a consultation remained feasible before my course.
— Vocabulary: “Assess” and “remained feasible” precisely describe the decision the writer could not make. The paired consequences distinguish the restriction on waiting elsewhere from the uncertainty about fitting a consultation around the course.I had to leave for a prepaid evening course; reception confirmed that doing so would remove me from the list.
— Readability: The semicolon links the necessary departure directly to its consequence. “Doing so” refers clearly to leaving, allowing the sentence to convey the policy efficiently without awkward repetition.If that option is impractical, simply explaining the available choices at reception would enable more informed decisions.
— Task Fulfillment: This fallback recognizes that text notifications may be difficult to introduce. It keeps the request achievable and focused on better communication, while preserving the central aim of helping patients decide how to manage changing waits.
What moves an answer from 7 to 9 to 11
These are model answers written to show each level. The labels are practice estimates, not examiner scores.
Cover each email bullet with relevant detail, explain its effect on the reader and make a workable request. Keep a consistent register, with an opening, connected paragraphs and an appropriate closing.
- Content/Coherence: Level 7 models communicate the main ideas; level 9 models develop relevant details with clear connections; level 11 models sustain precise, well-integrated development.
- Vocabulary: Compare adequate everyday wording with more varied, accurate choices at level 9 and flexible, precise expression at level 11.
- Readability: Look for increasingly controlled grammar, sentence variety, punctuation and paragraphing. Complexity helps when it keeps the message easy to read.
- Task Fulfillment: Compare how fully the response addresses the request, develops enough relevant detail and maintains an appropriate tone for the audience within the task limits.
Assess the criteria together. A longer answer or rarer words alone do not establish a higher level.
Answer this question and get your level